You get more out of therapy when you arrive with a clear focus, speak honestly about what is and is not working, and put what you learn into practice between appointments. The eight tips below cover what to do before, during and after each session, from setting goals and tracking your mood to giving your psychologist feedback. They apply whether you see someone online or in person, such as a psychologist in Sherwood Park or elsewhere, and whether you are working on anxiety, low mood, stress, relationships or a specific life change.
Before you start: set up therapy to succeed
The first few sessions usually involve an assessment: your psychologist asks about your current concerns, history, health, relationships and goals. It is also your chance to assess them. It is reasonable to ask about their training, the approaches they use (for example cognitive behavioral therapy, acceptance and commitment therapy or emotion-focused therapy), how long treatment usually lasts for concerns like yours, how confidentiality works and what fees, cancellation rules and insurance or benefit options apply.
Research on psychotherapy consistently points to the therapeutic relationship as one of the strongest predictors of good outcomes. If after a few sessions you do not feel heard or safe, it is fine to say so or to try someone else.
8 tips for maximizing your sessions with a psychologist
1. Agree on clear goals
“Feel better” is a starting point, but specific goals make progress visible. Examples: “Sleep through the night at least four nights a week,” “Speak up in team meetings without panicking,” or “Argue less with my partner about money.” Ask your psychologist to revisit goals every few weeks so you both know whether the plan is working.
2. Prepare a short agenda
Sessions often run around 50 minutes, and it is easy to spend the first half on small talk or whatever happened that morning. Before each appointment, jot down two or three things you want to cover: a situation that went badly, a pattern you noticed or a question about last week’s exercise. You do not have to stick to the list, but it keeps the most important issues from slipping away.
3. Give yourself a buffer before and after
Rushing from a meeting straight into therapy, then straight back to email, leaves little room to engage or absorb. Aim for five to ten minutes of quiet before the session: sit in the car, take a short walk or breathe slowly. For online sessions, close work tabs, silence notifications and choose a private spot where you will not be overheard. Keep a similar buffer afterward to let things settle.
4. Be as honest as you can
Therapy works on what you bring into the room. That includes things that feel embarrassing, such as drinking more than you would like, thoughts you are ashamed of, or the fact that you did not do the homework. Psychologists hear these things regularly and are trained to respond without judgment. If something is too hard to say, you can start with “There’s something I find hard to talk about,” and go from there.
5. Track your mood and symptoms between sessions
Memory is unreliable, especially when you are stressed. A simple daily log gives your psychologist far better information than “It’s been a rough week.” Many people rate a few things from 0 to 10 and add a short note.
| Day | Anxiety (0-10) | Mood (0-10) | Sleep (hours) | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Mon | 7 | 4 | 5 | Tense meeting at work, skipped lunch |
| Tue | 5 | 5 | 7 | Walked after work, felt calmer |
| Wed | 6 | 4 | 6 | Argument about family schedule |
Patterns often jump out after a week or two, such as mood dipping after poor sleep or anxiety spiking on particular days. Phone apps work too, but paper is fine. Sleep is often a big factor; if it is a struggle, our tips to fall asleep better may be worth discussing with your psychologist.
6. Keep a therapy notebook
Right after each session, write down the key points, any “aha” moments, the exercise you agreed to try, and questions that came up afterward. Over months, this becomes a record of what you have learned and a quick refresher when old patterns return. Some people also journal more freely between sessions to process feelings; bring anything you want to discuss.
7. Practice the skills in real life
Most change happens between appointments. If your psychologist suggests a breathing technique, a thought record, a gradual exposure step or a new way of phrasing a hard conversation, try it during the week, even imperfectly. Then report back on what happened. “I tried it and it did not help” is useful information, because it lets your psychologist adjust the approach. Building small practices into your day, such as a few minutes of reflection as part of a great morning routine, makes new skills easier to keep up.
8. Give honest feedback about the therapy itself
You are allowed to say “That comment didn’t sit well with me,” “I’d like more practical strategies,” or “We seem to keep going in circles.” Good psychologists welcome this, and many ask for feedback directly. Talking about the therapy often leads to some of the most productive conversations.
Look after yourself after hard sessions
Some sessions leave you tired, raw or unsettled, especially when you work through painful memories. That is normal and does not mean therapy is going badly. Plan something gentle for afterward: a walk, a warm drink, music, time with a pet or an early night. Avoid scheduling a difficult meeting or big decision straight after. If you regularly feel much worse for days after sessions, tell your psychologist so they can adjust the pace.
Common obstacles and how to handle them
- “I don’t know what to talk about.” Start with your mood log or the last moment you felt stuck, upset or proud. Your psychologist can take it from there.
- “I keep skipping the homework.” Say so. The task may be too big, poorly timed or not a good fit, and it can be broken into smaller steps.
- “Progress feels slow.” Compare your notes from the first month with now. Change is often gradual and easier to see on paper than day to day.
- “Life got busy and I want to pause.” Discuss it rather than disappearing. Spacing sessions out can be a better option than stopping abruptly.
Practical details that make a difference
- Consistency: weekly or biweekly sessions early on usually build momentum faster than irregular appointments.
- Cost and coverage: check what your insurance or workplace benefits plan covers for psychological services, whether you need a referral, and whether receipts must show a specific credential. In Canada, psychologist visits are often paid privately or through extended health benefits rather than provincial health plans, so check your plan’s annual limit.
- Medication questions: psychologists generally do not prescribe. If medication might help, they can coordinate with your family doctor or a psychiatrist.
- Online vs in person: both can work well. Online sessions save travel time; in-person sessions can make it easier to focus and feel connected. Choose what you will attend consistently.
When to seek help between sessions
Therapy is not an emergency service. If you are having thoughts of harming yourself or feel unable to stay safe, call or text 988 (the Suicide Crisis Helpline in Canada and the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline in the United States), call 911, or go to your nearest emergency department. Ask your psychologist early on what to do if things get worse between appointments. You can find more wellbeing articles in our Health category.
This article is general information, not medical or mental health advice. Speak with a qualified professional about your own situation.
Frequently asked questions
How many therapy sessions will I need?
It varies. Some focused concerns improve within a handful of sessions, while longstanding or complex issues can take months. Ask your psychologist for an estimate and review progress regularly.
What should I talk about in my first session?
Share what brought you in, how it affects your daily life, what you have tried and what you hope will change. Your psychologist will guide the conversation with questions.
Is it normal to feel worse after therapy?
Feeling tired or emotional after a hard session is common. If you feel much worse for days afterward, tell your psychologist so they can adjust the pace.
Can I switch psychologists if it is not a good fit?
Yes. A good working relationship matters a great deal. You can raise concerns first, and if things do not improve, it is reasonable to look for someone else.
Are online sessions as effective as in-person sessions?
For many common concerns, online therapy can work well. The best format is the one you can attend consistently in a private, comfortable space.
